If you want to start a lively discussion in a couples d-group, I have a wonderful suggestion: open up Ephesians 5 and start reading at verse 22 and go through 24, then pause for a moment and throw a simple question like, “So, what does that mean?” and see where it takes you.

That’s what we did this last week, and, quite honestly, it was the beginning of a very encouraging and meaningful discussion.

As the RMGs continue to host our elders and other church leaders as guest teachers on the issues in marriage and relationships, people are being challenged to look at themselves and to examine their Biblical roles and responsibilities as well as their obedience to God.

Often – and especially as husbands and wives – we find it so easy to reach for the speck in the other person’s eye while walloping them in the head with plank protruding from our own.

I learned a while ago – after great patience on the part of my lovely wife – that our relationship was much healthier when I concentrated on what it is God is asking of me, not what it is He is asking of her.  She did not need a second “conscience” reminding her about the “dos” and “don’ts” of wifedom; she needed me to be more concerned about being a Godly husband.

And–here is the crazy part–once I started following God, she was quick to follow me! She felt safe and secure in His will – not because of me, but because I was following Him. What a great and simple plan! It’s so easy!

So, why do we find it to be so hard? Just take a look in the mirror and you will find the answer. I do every morning, and while it’s tough to swallow, I am what makes it so hard; my pride, my will, my want, my ideas, my plans, my desperately wicked heart.

Which is why our d-group discussion ended with the rest of Ephesians 5 versus 25 through 33 — the man’s role. [And, men, recognize that there were two verses for the ladies and that there are eight for us… four times as many! Even God agrees that we are thick headed. ]

And after reading those verses, we realized the bottom line is that we just have to be like Christ and sacrifice our will and our way. No big deal… and yes, that is tongue in cheek. But as soon as we stop being selfish and begin being Christ-like, there will a dramatic and even miraculous change in our homes.

For more great keys to a Biblical marriage and relationships, visit the RMG nearest you!!! You won’t regret it.