Pretty powerful words, huh? I had learned the story of the paralytic from Mark 2 many times since my childhood, and somehow missed the great lesson on God’s forgiveness embedded in the text. Chris’s sermon on Sunday revealed the richness of this interaction with Jesus.

Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t miss that the paralytic’s sins were forgiven. I was able to glean AT LEAST that from the text on my own (as you can see, my powers of observation are astute). What I missed was exactly what the interaction revealed about Christ’s forgiveness for all believers—not just the paralytic.

Chris pointed out that this text reveals that Christ’s forgiveness is intimate, an undeniable fact, accomplished, enduring, repairing, comprehensive, deliverance and Christ’s emphasis. What struck me was not that I missed these truths the many times I have read this story before, but how much I miss them in my daily life.

Do you walk in forgiveness? No, really… do you? That was the question on my mind after mulling over what I had learned in Mark 2: 1-5. In that list, which is the hardest truth to embrace daily?

For me, seeing Christ’s forgiveness as “freeing deliverance” can be a struggle. Whenever I sin in a familiar area, the guilt of the sin is often compounded with remembering all of my similar past failures. In my heart, it feels as though God is displeased with me for EVERY time I have failed, and this latest sin is just adding to His disappointment in me.

Thankfully, I know the truth. When those moments hit, I have learned to counsel myself with verses like Psalm 103:12. I also know the truth of Colossians 1:22:

“…yet He has now reconciled you in His fleshly body through death, in order to present you before Him holy and blameless and beyond reproach…”

God sees me as Christ, and because of Christ’s sacrifice, He does not count my sins—past, present and future—against me.  I can walk in “freeing deliverance” because God has said to me “daughter, your sins are forgiven.”

Knowing my heart, I have to admit that there was little grace toward him in that conversation. And I certainly wasn’t acting “kind,” “patient” or “with gentleness” the way we are encouraged to in 2 Timothy 2:24. How could I? This pastor had affected some people close to me, and I found none of those things in my heart whenever I thought of him.

Incredibly, there is a way, but only through what Chris called “dependent obedience.” Galatians 3:3 says “Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh?” I often live this way, forgetting that I was powerless to save myself from sin and also powerless to become more like Christ.

Does this pastor deserve grace? No… but then again, neither do I. Without Christ, I am a wretched sinner without a shred of goodness.  Despite the fact that I had nothing to offer Him, Christ saved me and traded His life for mine. Dwelling on that fact alone gives me a new perspective on my opinion of myself and others.

The story doesn’t end there. God also send His Spirit to lead me (Romans 8:14), help me (Romans 8:26) and sanctify me (Romans 15:16). The only hope I have of being gracious, loving, gentle, kind and patient with those around me—especially those with whom I disagree—is by living every day in complete dependence on the Spirit.

This truth is especially precious to me this time of year, when we pause to celebrate Christ’s birth. I celebrate His birth knowing that it led to His death, His resurrection, my redemption and the coming of the Spirit. Joy to the World!

In his sermon on Sunday, Chris offered another glimpse into Jesus’ earthy ministry, through Mark 1:32-39. The account details Jesus healing many people, then instead of basking in the people’s adoration, He retreats for a time of solitude and prayer.

Prayer is a discipline that God has been working on in my life recently, helped both by the counsel of women I consider mentors and being driven to my knees by difficult situations. Jesus’ example in Mark wasn’t just about prayer, it was also about finding a “secluded place” (Mark 1:35). Solitude isn’t something I seek naturally, but God has graciously been showing me that to experience him fully, I must rid myself of the distractions and demands of the world around me. For me, this means closing my computer and being in a different room than my phone. Praise God that He is teaching me some of this before the added distraction (but blessing) of little ones!

A well-known verse on prayer is Philippians 4:6, which charges Christians not to be anxious and instead give everything over to God in prayer. For me, it has been even more powerful when considered in the light of the following verse, Philippians 4:7: “And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Spending time in prayer sets my heart and mind firmly in Christ, giving me God’s peace—a peace that is not dependent on circumstances, other people or position. It is a peace that allows me to understand what “Priority Driven Livin’” is really about.

On second thought, maybe I don’t want a holiday that is set apart to celebrate Christ’s sinless life. When I take the time to fellowship with God in solitude and prayer, every day can be a celebration of the gospel!

As much as I despise this insatiable appetite for notice and acclaim, there lurks in me a deeper, darker bent to my thought life.  It is the other side of the slippery slope of feeling sorry for myself.  I find that my flesh is so desperate to be exalted that it will even use my occasions of hurt to focus on myself.  I slip to the other side and ever so slowly slide into despair.  I can even justify this self-absorption of hurt feelings to some inner sense of healing. Either way, self is the focus, and Christ is dethroned in my wicked heart.

This affliction isn’t unique to me and instead is something every sinner has in common. In Romans, Paul writes: “Wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death?  Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, on the one hand I myself with my mind am serving the law of God, but on the other, with my flesh the law of sin.” (Romans 7:24-25)

God’s answer is to get my eyes off of myself—altogether and completely—so I can fully behold the beauty of Christ and His gospel of redemption.  I must constantly fix my gaze towards Christ and leave behind the slippery slope of self.

A speech pathologist said it was too early to be classified as stuttering and would probably resolve itself, but my heart broke and my mind raced; “what if she does stutter? How will others see her? Can they look past the words to hear the heart behind them? Why did you do this to her, Lord? Why does she have to struggle? Why can’t it be me?”

Can you see it? Disguised as compassion, my sin festered in my mind, but as usual, my sin was clear in the eyes of my husband. As he lovingly tried to shepherd my heart by pointing to the idolatry of my children and lack of trust in God, I fought to tune him out and not blame him. After all, stuttering is hereditary, and he stuttered as a child. Clearly he was the cause of the suffering I imagined my daughter would endure, and he doesn’t even seem to care that she stutters. It seems ridiculous, but even a mother’s heart is deep with sin.

I never imagined myself to be the kind of mom that idolizes her children. Even when I was asked to write for the FBC blog as a mother of young children, I wanted to be clear that I don’t identify myself as a mom of young children, but as a Christian, then a wife, and then a mom. And yet I made her my idol.

I found myself questioning God’s goodness. Of course if you had asked me, I would have denied it. I didn’t even realize what I was doing, but when I look at the questions I asked God- it’s clear. “WHY? WHY? WHY?” translates to “You don’t know what you are doing GOD!” Here I was in the middle of a very small storm and I was questioning God’s goodness. I always envisioned myself praising God through the darkest of situations, especially when I reflect on all that He saved me from, and yet in my flesh I wasn’t thankful for this trial in my daughter’s life.

I would love to say that I’m completely rejoicing now, but it’s still a battle in my mind to glorify God in all of my thoughts and not to question HIS ways. I try to remember that surely He loves my daughter more than I do. After all, the Father sent HIS own SON to die in the place of believers, and I don’t even want my daughter to endure a stutter. WOW! We really do have a loving and trustworthy God.

We start the festivities with, “It’s The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown”, a month later it’s, “A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving”, and we end with the grand finale, “A Charlie Brown Christmas.”

Seriously, what is there not to love? Turkey, prime rib and all the fixings; cookies, pies, and candies; leaves changing colors; snow on the mountains; football; the smell of cinnamon and spice; all culminating with Christmas trees, lights, movies, decorations, music, and more!

But, then New Years comes bringing the joy to an end, and as I see new months looming ahead and I begin the countdown to the next season of delight.

I was recently discussing this annual cycle of mine with my daughter, and she said, “Dad, every day we should celebrate the gospel.”

That caused me to take a step back and examine my enthusiasm for the holidays. It is a bit misplaced. Quite simply, it is in the temporal and not the eternal.

In reality, with the gospel, we as Believers do have something to be thrilled about each and every day! Every day is “Thanksgiving” and “Christmas” because every day we can thank God for His unfathomable, undeserved and sovereign plan for our salvation and sanctification!

Now, does all this mean we should enjoy the holidays any less? Not at all! But, we need to enjoy them in perspective and remember the real reasons why we can and should celebrate.

So, enjoy family, friends, food, decorations and all that this season brings! But, as you do, please remember the true reason for our celebration found in God’s Word from Ephesians and Romans; we should give “thanks always and for everything” and we can because, “while we were still sinners, Christ died for us …”

Thank you, God, for the gift of your Son!

It truly is living in the “here and now” that brings the big picture of life into focus.

Instead, we tend to dwell on the past or constantly plan for the future, which can cause us to miss out on the journey of the moment. The sweetest of these moments is spending time with those we love. 

The same is true for believers of spending time with the One who is love. How sweet it is to have those moments on bended knee and allowing our first Love to speak into our hearts His gracious and kind words of comfort and truth. Those times with our God let the glorious news of the gospel fill our hearts afresh with peace and thanksgiving, and let us know that God is well in control and has a glorious plan of redemption that includes wretched sinners like me.

It is no wonder that Paul exhorted us to be courageously and persistently in prayer with a focused alertness and attitude of thanksgiving (Colossians 4:2).  Truly, a Christian’s Thanksgiving happens every day as he humbles himself before the LORD in prayer.

We are grateful for the courage it took to share this and hope it will give a picture of hope and healing for you or those you love and care for. For those who haven’t been harmed in this way, we believe it’s important for you to see and hear how the gospel can radically transform any heart and any situation.

It took years for the State of California to put my biological father on trial. Ironically, it took longer to get him into the courtroom than it did for him to pay for his crimes. A childhood full of abuse was paid for in just 3 short years! And as I searched for his status on the Megan’s Law website last week, I discovered he lives only 18 miles away from me! A man capable of committing such heinous acts against his own children is free! And yet instead of anger at his sin, I find myself broken over my own sin.

Looking at the website, I can see my vindication in black and white: “lewd and lascivious acts with a minor under 14.” There it is, for all to see, like a scarlet letter that will follow him into his grave. Even worse, when he stands before God, that line will be just one of thousands of heinous sins committed against God. But before you too condemn him to hell, let me ask what your caption would say?? Mine would say, “idolater, fornicator, homosexual, liar, thief, druggie.” Am I anymore deserving of God’s grace than he is?

When I look at my life before Christ saved me, I truly see myself as the worst of sinners. Before I was saved, I always took pride that I never “hurt” anyone, but in reality my sin marred Jesus beyond recognition (Isaiah 52:14, 53:3). There was nothing good in me. I didn’t and still don’t deserve to be chosen by God and forgiven of my sins.

So although my initial reaction is to be fearful that I may see him at the grocery store or mall—or worse yet that he will show up at my home—I can’t help but feel compassion for him as I reflect on how the gospel intersects this situation. If I truly believe that my heart is deceitfully wicked (Jeremiah 17:9) and that there is nothing good in me (Psalm 14:1-3), then how can I look at others with condemnation?

Of course, I will exercise wisdom and keep him away from me and my children, but I do feel sorry for him. No one grows up wanting to deeply wound their children, but the wickedness of his heart allowed him to be lured and enticed by his own desires (James 1:14-15).

Several years ago, I wished he would die, but now I find myself praying that God would save his soul and use him to glorify Christ.

After all, Paul murdered Christians and look at how God used Paul to bring glorify to Jesus! In hindsight, I can see hundreds of blessings that resulted from the hundreds of trials I endured as a child.

I cling to 2 Corinthians 1:3-7 and, although Paul is talking specifically about being comforted in religious persecution, I find that the comfort God gave me in these trials has allowed me to bond with others who have received God’s comfort in their afflictions. It’s so evident in this situation that what Satan meant for evil, God meant for good. Rejoice with me in God’s grace!

I must admit that at times my heart has been tempted to manipulate the emotions of the saints by utilizing music. At times, I’ve wanted for believers to respond to the music and not to the truth of the Gospel.  Therefore I constantly repent, guard and examine my heart to make sure that it is all about the Gospel.  Our focus should not be in manipulating the saints through cool music, complex arrangements or killer drum beats.  The Gospel is the only thing that should excite me, the other musicians and all those whom we lead in corporate praise.

The musical talents anyone has come from God. James 1:17 teaches that all good things and every perfect gift comes from above. What we have is only by his grace. No one deserves, or even earned, the ability to sing, play musical instruments, understand musical concepts and rhythm.  All that we have is a stewardship, entrusted to us by God.

All that we are and all that we do is by the grace of God.  Its all a stewardship.  That simple truth should cause us to sing praises wholeheartedly and encourage others to see the greatness of God.  We have been saved by grace and we worship utilizing the gifts and strength given to us by grace. We serve one another by grace.  All that we are and do is by God’s grace.

Yet, as stewards, we are called to pursue godly character and humility. In our ministry to one another and in our conversations on Sundays, let us strive to be more like Christ. Let us learn and practice together the principles of humility found in Philippians 2:5-8.
5 Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus,
6 who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped,
7 but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men.
8 Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

Thanks for allowing me to lead and join you in singing praise as we model Christ together.